Taylor Swift got engaged to Travis Kelce. It is a match made in heaven—a millionaire football player marries a billionaire pop star. Why do you care?
Parasocial relationships are an increasingly important subject matter. With the rise of technology and the lack of boundaries between celebrities and media, the average person may feel closely connected to someone they have never met. Take, for example, Taylor Swift. Sure, she makes decent music (it is not my style) and she has Easter eggs spread throughout tours and albums, but she does not care about you. She cares that you care about her. Swift wants your money and streams.
This, unfortunately, goes for most artists today. The second someone gets a taste of money and fame; they lose their ability to connect with the common person.
TikTok user scorpiomarsss posted her reaction to Swift’s engagement, crying into the camera while saying that “the artist [she] has known the longest in [her] life” is getting married. It is concerning to me that people feel so emotionally connected to strangers. Sure, you know a bit more about this person than, say, your barista from a week ago, but why is a stranger such a large part of your life that you feel you can cry about her engagement?
After the Eras tour, where Swift wore a dress resembling the lesbian flag (shades of pink, orange, and white) and a grainy video from 2010 where Swift may have kissed a woman, a subset of Swifties rose up to defend the potential of Taylor Swift being a lesbian. This group, known as “Gaylors,” has a Sub-Reddit with over 50K members. After Swift started dating Kelce, Gaylors jumped to several conclusions, all stemming from the potential of Swift being closeted or something to do with her “queer identity.” Swift has never explicitly stated her sexuality, nor do any of her songs imply something about women. These people jump through hoops to defend the potential of “Taylor, the person” being a lesbian while “Taylor, the character” is someone she plays when in public.
“This is so annoying to me,” Reddit user throw_ra878 said on the Gaylor Sub-Reddit. “She’s leaning in on ‘my music directly mirrors my personal life’ and I’m so agitated about it because NO. Why is she doing this? Why is she saying everything is straightforward when it’s absolutely not?”
These people have formed a parasocial relationship with Swift, fully believing they know her private life and identity outside of what she shares with the public. The truth is nobody knows Swift but those in her close circle. I doubt anyone posting about her “hiding her queer identity” knows her personally.
People treat many celebrities like this, not just Swift. We need to educate ourselves and growing generations about the dangers of parasocial relationships and how to set up boundaries with these matters. At the end of the day, thousands of strangers get engaged, and Swift is just one of them.
